[Rick Mullin]

I agree that "allergies" and "soliloquies" should be how those words are done... plural.

This plus-parlor. Of course, our sonnet writer is a big Shakespeare fan.

Sorry to be so negative, but nothing is really knocking me out this year.

I do like how and where you repeat "my bed's a stage".

[David Danoff]

I like this, but I think getting the whole sestet into present tense and making "allergies" plural (much more idiomatic) would be real improvements.

It also occurs to me, looking more closely at "marriage, death, dispersal, or old age," that the list is a bit oddly ordered. And "old age" (and maybe "death") telegraphs the poem's ending, which I'm not sure is helpful.

Maybe the fairy dust has had to be relinquished because of allergies? (For it to be still present, and causing an allergic reaction after all these years, seems odd--I think Eileen mentioned this already.)

Well, I do like the first couple stanzas and the ending very much.

[Mary McLean]

I just wanted to say a quick thanks to the people who commented. I think I'll go with Orwn's suggestion to pluralize- not necessarily better sense, but it sounds better. I'm playing with getting the sestet all in the present also:

The fairy dust sets off my allergies;
The sail now seems a shroud.

This also addresses the concern about it not literally being a shroud (although it was never literally a sail either...)

Any suggestions for a better title? I toyed with the idea of adding an exclamation point to emphasize the deliberate theatricality. This poem is never going to be subtle - it's a brash actor hamming up the classics. It was great fun to write, unleashing my inner diva. I'm glad many of you found it fun to read as well.

[Susan McLean]

Mary, I might suggest "Stages" as a title. To get rid of a rough spot in the meter, you could try L9 as "These days I'm doing more soliloquies." I like your reworking of L12-L13.

Susan