[Deborah Warren]

Although Tim has excluded himself from this bake-off, I'd like to post this spectacular sonnet which wowed me when Anthony Hecht gave it the Nemerov award six years ago. Pieces of it (I don't have Tim's prodigious memory) have lodged themselves firmly in my mind.


THE TRACK OF A STORM

Bastille Day, 1995

We grieve for the twelve trees we lost last night,
pillars of our community, old friends
and confidants dismembered in our sight,
stripped of their crowns by the unruly winds.
There were no baskets to receive their heads,
no women knitting by the guillotines,
only two sleepers rousted from their beds
by fusillades of hailstones on the screens.
Her nest shattered, her battered hatchlings drowned,
a stunned and silent junko watches me
chainsawing limbs from corpses of the downed,
clearing the understory of debris
while supple saplings which survived the blast
lay claim to light and liberty at last.


This elegant sonnet with its perfect metaphor is both formal and intimate, and I feel completely humbled on reading the closing couplet.

[Clive Watkins]

Spot on, Deborah!

(Glad you are still around....)

Clive Watkins

[graywyvern]

wonderful, yes

[Jim Hayes]

What's to say Deborah?
It's perfect.

My thanks to you, ahh Tim.

Jim Hayes

[nyctom]

Ah. One of my personal favorites from The Deed of Gift. Thank you for posting it Deborah.

Tom

[Tim Murphy]

aw shucks, Deborah, ya shouldna. But while we're on the subject of sonnets not entered in the bake-off, I'll post on another thread two sonnets by Gwynn and Davis, both of which have appeared on Mastery, and both of which I believe surpass my little effort.

[David Anthony]

Yes, a tour de force..
It's in Hecht's Intro to "Very Far North".
Wonderful the way Tim made the connection between the day, Bastille Day, the history and the event, to create the central metaphor.
In common with the best of Shakespeare's sonnets, the closing couplet doesn't summarise but takes the poem somewhere new while remaining faithful to the metaphor.
In common with many of the best contemporary sonnets, the close is gently understated and brings a refreshing note of hope or encouragement.
Regards,
David


[This message has been edited by David Anthony (edited May 03, 2002).]

[Nigel Holt]

Tim,

You should have included this in the bake-off - there is no room for modesty when dealing with great poems!

Terrific.

Nigel

[Dick Davis]

I admire this sonnet by Tim too, very much - but it's not my favorite sonnet by Tim. That space is reserved for the much cooler (and affectionately funny) sonnet in Very Far North, "The making of an Artist", which for me is a pure (ok somewhat impure) delight.

[Roger Slater]

Dick, would you or someone else post Tim's sonnet that you prefer to this one? I thought this one was superb, right up there with the best I have read recently, so the prospect of seeing an even better one is hard to resist.

I'm definitely going to have to start ordering some books! My appetite has definitely been whetted for more sonnets by Davis and Murphy. (I already have Alicia's book, so I didn't meant to slight her. Do the other sonneteers who have posted so far have books yet? If not, it's a terrible shame).