[Susan McLean]

Great parodies, Julie and Lightning Bug. I think that parodies seem to be a better approach than straight-out poetic howls, because some control sharpens the sentiment and the satire.

Susan

[Lightning Bug]

Thanks, Susan... they're kinda fun, too.

and excerpt after Whitman:

O! Cantor, my Cantor!

O, cantor! my cantor! Your final song is heard,
Your choir has gloried every note, and sanctified each word.
The coda we hear, the people cheer, the standing crowd ovating,
While listen ears with tintinitis – cold to cantillating.
O Art! Art! Art!
Why make hearts so dour
sov’reign o’er my cantor’s song
from yon ivory tower.

[Lightning Bug]

.

(After Bob Dylan)

Oh the sonnet bards are barking, on the conference block.
They're asking what the matter is, but West Chester, she don't talk.
and the founder folds his derby, and the dean defiles her grape.
But over at the center, they know there's no escape.

Oh, mama, is this how we're gettin' fed...
to expect Kim Bridgford's buffet,
but get Sam Gwynn's gruel instead.

Shakespeare, he's on a panel, and he says, "Sit, write here."
He was once a poet-senator, but now he's just a bombardeer.
And the famous light verse midget, he fidgets with his pen,
but deep insight is art, he noses dill a sin.

Oh, mama, is this how we're gettin' fed...
to expect Kim Bridgford's buffet,
but get Sam Gwynn's gruel instead.

When the papist paparazza told the published in the room,
we could watch her read for free, 'neath the Pennsylvanian moon,
I said "Ah, come on, now, you know it's only Sapphic crap."
She said,"Your Sapphic crap just knows how to sleep, but mine knows how to nap."

Oh, mama, is this how we're gettin' fed...
to expect Kim Bridgford's buffet,
but get Sam Gwynn's gruel instead.

.

[Jayne Osborn]

W H Davies Leisure
Displeasure

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time for what’s unfair?—

No time to stand beneath the boughs,
And ponder to ourselves: Just how’s

This situation come about?
’Twill be resolved one day, no doubt.

No time to see if any cash
Went missing. (Someone got a stash?)

No time to see, in broad daylight,
what’s going on. Let’s hope we might

Live long enough to see the end
Of this dispute that irks our friend.

A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time for what’s unfair.

[Lightning Bug]

Jayne,

Good one - but while I agree with you that WCU was probably unfair to Kim, perhaps you should moderate the allegations of
"lots of [missing] cash" until the finalized audit is able to prove your point.

b

[Jayne Osborn]

Thanks, and I take your point, Bugsy. I've amended it to "if any''.

Midnight beckons here... I might tweak it some more tomorrow.

Jayne

[Erik Olson]

The RAPE of the CONFERENCE CHAIR
An HEROI-COMICAL P O E M

What dire Offence from one's Dismissal springs,
What mighty Contests rise from spreadsheet Things,
I sing — This verse to Samuel, Muse! is due;
This, even Bridgford may vouchsafe to view:
Slight is the subject, but not so the praise,
If she inspire, and he approve my lays.
SSay what strange motive, Goddess! could possess
A well-bred Board to sack a Poetess?
Oh say what stranger cause, yet unexplored,
Could make a gentle Poet slam a Board?
And dwells such Rage in dulcet Bosoms then?
And lodge such daring Souls in little Men?
s

[Allen Tice]

Rose, are your rhymes acrobatic or merely adroit?

[John Whitworth]

Parody (A.A. Milne)

Now the argument gets heated
One thing has to be repeated,
Kim has been unjustly treated
By the Board.
Let me shriek it, let me shout it.
Let me never never doubt it
Though I know fuck all about it.
Praise the Lord!

[Lightning Bug]

Clever one, John. I like how you slyly imply that being told fuck all is perhaps the worst part of the mistreatment you point to. "Booted is Truth; Truth booted", eh?