Just submitted the Feghoot.
For folks wondering what a Feghoot is, here's the explanation:
And here's my Feghoot, for your amusement and edification:
"Ferdinand Feghoot and the Zero-G Nunnery"
By Kevin Andrew Murphy
Ferdinand Feghoot, whose fame ever burgeons,
Encountered a castle with ninety-nine virgins
All floating in space, a Zero-G Nunnery
Bursting with bombshells, just like a gunnery.
He sauntered in swinging his black bumbershoot,
Then stopped and he stared and he dropped his cheroot,
And while weightless tumbled his burning Havana,
The nuns as one cried out, "'Tis Feghoot! Hosanna!
'Tis Ferdie! Our main man! Our savior! The Dude!"
While Ferdinand stared, for the nuns were all nude.
The Space Nuns explained then, with smiles and dimples,
"Some horrible space-rats have eaten our wimples!
Our vestments as well, our albs and our cassocks-
They've gorged on our raiment till they're fat as hassocks!
Our nunnery's cursed with a plague of Rodentia
And soon we'll be hosting the Pope-in-Absentia!
We even dare knickers, the space-rats will bite us,
Yet if we're seen starkers, the Space Pope will smite us!
Our nakedness, truly a shame we can't bear-
Please help us, Feghoot! Get us something to wear!"
"Of course, holy sisters!" our hero cried, gallant.
"I'll do what I can, for I have a small talent
For getting things done, and if it's attainable,
Explaining a moral if one is explainable.
Now show me these space-rats; I'll put my old magic
To bear on this problem you find oh-so tragic:
Celestial rodents, in their rude depravity-
I see this is grave, even though there's no gravity-
Have gobbled up every nun-sensical suit.
I'll get them all back, or my name's not Feghoot."
The nuns sang "Hosanna! Praise be! Hallelujah!
Of course, Ferdinand, we will show the rats to ya!"
They opened the vestry: Space-rats floated eating
The vestments till Feghoot gave bumbershoot beating-
Umbrella held high, Feg' leapt into the fray
And beat rats around like 'twas space-rat croquet.
Then once all the space-rats were screaming and shrieking,
He reached down their throats and thus silenced their squeaking,
Removing the cassocks and wimples and tons
Of vestments to cover the naked Space Nuns.
Once clothed (freshly laundered) the Space nuns were praising
Ferd Feghoot, "Oh Ferdie, you're simply amazing!
Those horrible space-rats that filled us with loathing,
You taught them a lesson and got back our clothing!"
"'Twas nothing," said Feghoot, "I just know my lores:
Like it says on the salt box 'When it pains, it roars.'
I knew that, and once I had seen your position,
I recalled something else I learned from a magician,
Who taught me the magic of conjuring hats:
All I did was pull habits out of the rats.