[John Whitworth]

For this curious gap between Christmas and New Year. No money, just the admiraton of your peers. You have to write a poem inspired by a daft headline. Here's mine:

BBC News.

Swine like me just love those pearls.
We get then while we can.
Cameron was beaten by three girls
And a semi-naked man.

Beggars, buggers, belted earls,
And every one a fan.
Cameron was beaten by three girls
And a semi-naked man.

Blue the banner that unfurls
Above the Tory clan.
Cameron was beaten by three girls
And a semi-naked man.

It skirls and swirls and whirls and twirls,
The dance of Caliban.
Cameron was beaten by three girls
And a semi-naked man.



[This message has been edited by John Whitworth (edited December 29, 2008).]

[Cally Conan-Davies]

My Jailed Sons Are Good Boys


All my jailed sons are good boys.
My Tony feed his family.
He do not kill, fear gun noise.
And traffick drug, my Horty?
No making drug, my Milad,
in shed out back. I so sad.
Police take my Kabalan.
Since they were kid, not one can
say one bad thing about them.
But all you press make big noise
so no fair trial for my boys.

Milad not bad,
Horty not naughty,
Kabalan have human shape,
Tony drug lord? Not even fat!

My four jailed sons are good men.
They love their mum. I love them.

[E. Shaun Russell]

On The World Junior Hockey Championship

It's not enough to have the best
Damn hockey team in every test,
It seems we also have to be
Polite and beat them mercifully.

How dare we rout poor Kazakhstan
And Germany? We're better than
Them both, it's true: we'll get the cup,
But still, could we have not let up?

Such travesty! It isn't sporting!
There's more that's worthy of reporting:
This morning's news upon our win?
"Early blowouts concern for Quinn."

[Janet Kenny]

A Test of faith in land of tragics


We’ve gone and lost the second test
and now South Africa’s the best.
Our ego’s slipping, we are wanting
more than empty style from Ponting.
Our final chance to wreak revenge —
the wickets loom now like Stonehenge.

The Poms are watching. Each test dashes
arrogance about the Ashes.
Now Warne’s a German we must all
just keep our eyes fixed on the ball.
The national psyche wilts as cricket
tells our egos where to stick it.


_________
(edited back to say this headline was on the ABC (Australian) site.)

[This message has been edited by Janet Kenny (edited December 30, 2008).]

[Cally Conan-Davies]

Excellent, Janet - excellent!!


Cally

[Cally Conan-Davies]

(Janet - I couldn't resist doing one, too! I'm heart-broken! Headline from The Age)


Invincible No More

The Proteas revel when Siddle goes out.
Now Ponting stands up as our Captain of Doubt.

Ably blocking the dreaded word ‘crisis’,
he talks to the Press, he slices and dices

the wicket in Perth, and tries to look pumped,
but back in the rooms he knows he is stumped.

No Gilchrist or Warnie — our wickets are shattered,
and Hayden and Hussey were clearly out-batted.

Please, Captain, next Test keep your crease and pretend
Australia’s ascendency’s not at an end.

[Janet Kenny]

Excellent Cally!
And now, thanks to the glories of technology these are the best metrical poems on Eratosphere.

(My sympathies to Maryann and Alex in the kitchen.)

[Cally Conan-Davies]

Indeed, Janet, indeed they are!

Although I believe my current encouraging slant-rhymed couplet to Alex on TDE is quite a superior example of the form! (for the next five minutes at least!)



ps Just trying out a new emoticon and hoping MC isn't watching!

[R. S. Gwynn]

A real headline:

Gwynn Feels Larkin's Pain

Gwynn feels Larkin's pain.
Larkin's pain was real,
And there is no gain
If no pain we feel.

"Larkin's pain was real,"
Gwynn has often said.
"If no pain we feel
We are likely dead."

Gwynn has also said,
"Pain will surely tell
Us we are not dead.
Larkin knew this well."

Pain will surely tell
Us to groan and gain.
Larkin knew this well.
Gwynn feels Larkin's pain.

[Baseball players Tony Gwynn and Barry Larkin]

[Janet Kenny]

[Baseball players Tony Gwynn and Barry Larkin

That's tremendous Sam! You're after the closing date but the headline was so incredible I believe a special extension must be allowed.