A Weighty Problem A good support bra is invaluable. —my doctor

All right, all right, I know a good support
bra is an invaluable asset.
Could you write me a prescription for one,
doctor? D cup or double D. I dreamed
even heaven was reserved for Maiden-
forms, countless clouds floating with flat-chested
girls, long-legged galaxies of gaunt glamor
Horse nebulae of hunger dream silicon
implants, collagen injections. What god
jiggled, giggled, and guffawed at that joke?
Knock-knock. Who’s there? Knockers but what’s the punch
line? Same as the pick-up line, viz, I love
my wife, but thanks for the mammaries. Mast,
nipple, nibble, a nib, a milky point
of view, while the goggle-eyed ogler gloms
pneumatic bliss, spirit made palpitant
quick flesh among us, Quonset-hut racks, quaint
ranks of matronly bosoms, nurturing
stopcocks to a nation, salute the flags,
take to the ramparts, whalebone-armored breasts
uplifted. I find such upkeep too dear.
Vive Vanity Fair, Victoria,
Warner, Bali, and cross my underwired
xiphoid process with Playtex. Write a scrip,
young doctor, perfect support for yearning
zaftig women, zealots of razzmatazz.