Eratosphere

Eratosphere (https://www.ablemuse.com/erato/index.php)
-   The Distinguished Guest (https://www.ablemuse.com/erato/forumdisplay.php?f=31)
-   -   Deck the Halls 2010 #1: Foxgloves (https://www.ablemuse.com/erato/showthread.php?t=12631)

Susan McLean 12-10-2010 08:56 PM

This is elegantly written, and I enjoy the descriptions. But the contrast between Mozart and Nature feels too pat to me, too self-evident. Somehow the snaky foxgloves at the end seem to me to want to say something less obvious about the ways of the world than the earlier part of the poem would suggest.

Susan

Rick Mullin 12-10-2010 10:48 PM

I agree with Orwn and Susan. Despite having certain seductive qualities, this poem is ultimate clinical in nature.

Philip Quinlan 12-11-2010 01:37 AM

I think the poem actually happens here:

Mozart does it so neatly,
answering every question posed.
I swear his concerto billowing out the porch
attracts bird song.
Their song
is not so neatly balanced as the master’s,
their melodies can end in queries
or falter in mid-arc without resolution
while no matter how far Mozart’s questing strays
it always folds back to its origin
not just by counterpoint but re-affirmation
as if the world made sense.


and nothing new happens after that. The switch to foxgloves doesn't give me any new insight, it just restates the point.

The best line here is:

their melodies can end in queries

and I would have liked to see that idea developed.

But yes, hopefully FV will make a good showing in DTH 2010. A few foxgloves among the clipped hedges!

Philip

Petra Norr 12-11-2010 06:26 AM

I admired it at once. Love the opening line as well as the ending of the second stanza. The lush foxglove-stanza is very nice, and the two last stanzas charming. I think it’s wonderfully written.

David Rosenthal 12-11-2010 09:05 AM

The lines have strong bones and the poem sounds good. I also like the sentiment of the final lines, and there are very resonant pieces here and there. I think "as if the world made sense" and "and these are nothing like Mozart" are unnecessary guideposts that get in the way instead of deepen anything.

Meanwhile, I have to say the Mozart seems to get a bad rap here. One of the things I think is remarkable about mozart in particular is his swagger, brashness, and emotion. Sure it all comes home in the end, but that is the surprising wonder of it more than anything else. I think a more precise-sounding and meticulous-sounding composer (Bach? Haydn? I dunno...) would have worked beeter as the poster child for "neatness" and straightness. This actually threw me off a little at the start -- the first line did not match my intuitive impression of Mozart.

David R.

Richard Meyer 12-11-2010 09:22 AM

Is anyone else having a problem viewing this thread? The poem no longer appears, at least on my computer screen. The posts show up, but not the poem.

Richard

Rick Mullin 12-11-2010 09:28 AM

I'm having the same problem. The site is a bit clunky this morning.

Maryann Corbett 12-11-2010 10:13 AM

The picture-backgrounds has now been added to the posts with the poems in them. I have to conclude that the pictures are related to any technical problems people are having. You need to let Alex know, with full technical details about your browser and version.

Do you folks see nothing at all in the first post, or do you see the background image and not the words, or what?

Firefox version 3.6.3, running on Mac OSX, version 10.5.8 isn't having any problem.

Alex Pepple 12-11-2010 10:20 AM

No problem here. Those of you having problems, what browsers and versions are you using? My immediate recommendation would be to upgrade your browsers to the latest version.

Cheers,
...Alex

Editing in to ask those with problems: If you select the entire post area, does the text appear in the reverse background of the selected area? (You select all by holding down the CTRL key and hitting the 'A' key on PCs. Or, simply hold down the right mouse button and drag it over the entire area of the post.)

Richard Meyer 12-11-2010 11:34 AM

The poem (in white print) now appears overlaid on the color background. Until a few minutes ago, all I got on the first post box was a blank white screen. Suddenly, without my doing anything, because I don't know how to do very much with computers, things seem to be working.

I have an iMac 2006 model desktop computer (OS X 10.4.11), and I use Safari.

Richard


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:44 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.