Yes, I'm amazed that there's never been a thread on this topic before. Anyway, here are a couple of well-known ones by Auden:

Private faces in public places
Are wiser and nicer
Than public faces in private places.


Pick a quarrel, go to war,
Leave the hero in the bar;
Hunt the lion, climb the peak:
No one guesses you are weak.


And one of the best political epigrams of all time, from the Peasants' Revolt:

When Adam delved and Eve span,
Who was then the gentleman?

And, speaking of Auden, I have called upon this at many a reading...

A poet's hope: to be,
like some valley cheese,
local, but prized elsewhere.

Belloc is good at epigrams:

The accursed power that stands on Privilege
(And goes with Women, and champagne and Bridge)
Broke - and Damocracy resumed her reign:
(Which goes with Bridge, and Women and Champagne).

I'm tired of Love: I'm still more tired of Rhyme.
But Money gives me pleasure al the time.

Good morning, Algernon: Good morning, Percy.
Good morning, Mrs Roebeck. Christ, have mercy!

Perhaps this one's a little too long to be an epigram, but I feel you can't have Belloc without Chesterton, so here's his "Elegy in a Country Churchyard":

THE men that worked for England
They have their graves at home:
And birds and bees of England
About the cross can roam.

But they that fought for England,
Following a falling star,
Alas, alas for England
They have their graves afar.

And they that rule in England,
In stately conclave met,
Alas, alas for England
They have no graves as yet.

At Ladew, the most famous topiary garden in North America, and also down the street from where I grew up, there is this Belloc inscribed around a sundial which I transcribe from memory so don't quote me:

I am a sundial, I botch
what's done far better by a watch.

A fine poem, Gregory, but not IMO an epigram. Chetserton was not (I am glad to say) an epigrammic man. Discursive rather.

Here's one from Ogden Nash:

Reflection on the Fallibility of Nemesis

He who is ridden by a conscience
Worries about a lot of nonscience;
He without benefit of scruples
His fun and income soon quadruples.

And another one:

The Wasp

The wasp and all his numerous family
I look upon as a major calamily.
He throws open his nest with prodigality,
But I distrust his waspitality.

Editing back: Some damn spelling algorithm corrected Nash's "calamily," so I've corrected its correction.

And if I simply drop the name of Dorothy Parker, people will come up with their own favorites, but here's one anyway:

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea;
And love is a thing that can never go wrong;
And I am Marie of Roumania.

Mike Juster is a fountain of epigrams, but the only one I can quickly find on the net is:

A Stern Warning to Canada

If you want peace,
withdraw your geese.

Lots of good ones here, and (for me) new as well.

Here's an obvious choice to add to the anthology:


Her whole Life is an Epigram, smack-smooth & nobly pen'd,
Platted quite neat to catch applause with a sliding noose at the end.

--William Blake