I like the poem, and i adore Francis. These compounds are almost the Mod E equivalent of Old E kennings. In fact, translated into Anglo-Saxon, it would be almost apprehensible to those who lack the language, and it would still be beautiful.

I guess I'm middle of the road on this one. Yea, I get a hint of a rural setting, like fire smoke lingering in the wood, and it was crafted - care was taken with the sound (although a couple of words seem to break the rhythm, rather than enhance it) - yet I feel unsatisfied. The time for one read wasn't wasted, yet the experience dies on subsequential reads.

[This message has been edited by Jerry Glenn Hartwig (edited June 07, 2006).]

I like the Robert Francis piece! Sure, it's not great poetry, but I'd much rather read something relatively unambitious but successful and fun, like that one, than something that's shooting for greatness and managing only to be average (i.e. 99% of all poetry).

And Michael, I don't blame you for instantly envisioning thousands of newbies using the piece as an excuse for cranking out unambitious little noun lists -- workshops will do that to a person. But if you just shut all that out of your mind and take the Robert Francis piece for what it is, I think you'll find there's an enjoyable little poem there.

Okay, here's mine. I cheated a little bit.

Shipyardward

Hingham-heading ferryboat onboard ticket-check
high-heel quickstep clank-clank upperdeck

portside seatmate chitchat coffeecup
castoff seaspray laptop zipping-up

windsock ponytail windchime buoy-bell
drawbridge underside lowtide clamshell

shoreline seaweed mussel-bound jettyrock
dockside ropetied boatramp babywalk

sunburn sunset saltwater waveslop
seafood restaurant backdoor dinner-drop

summertime suppertime steamborne fish funk
parking lot windshield sun-dried gull gunk.


[This message has been edited by Rose Kelleher (edited June 14, 2006).]

And, as if you needed further evidence that I have no life: http://www.ramblingrose.com/audio/shipyardward.wav

Rose! What a delightful poem and recording! Don't worry, I have no life either! That's how I found this ten minutes after you posted it! I feel like I just took that boat ride on the ocean - what a marvelous poem! Thanks!
Mary
PS: I'm assuming that's your voice?

AGH! ROSE! It's your very own voice!

Jiminey Crickets, that's stupendous!

I love it. Your reading is too, too, too fun.

--CS

Yep, that's me. I'd have liked to do it without running out of breath at the end, but after several tries I was starting to feel a little light-headed. :)

[p.s. Rats! I just realized I said "windowshield" instead of "windshield" in the recording. Well, I'm not doing it again!]


[This message has been edited by Rose Kelleher (edited June 14, 2006).]

That's brilliant, Rose.

Rose. That's marvellous. You'd be a great Rossini singer ;)
Janet

Wish I could hear it! My computer just gives me a "Entry Point Not Found" banner. And I downloaded RealPlayer to avoid that. I wish I knew a computer expert who could suggest a way to get around that. That would be SO suhweeet.