Bob, isn't there an 'a' missing before 'great battle'?

Jayne

I'm new here, but I'm a limerick addict:

Dear restaurant, please don’t feel hurt
If I spurn you, including dessert.
I have very good grounds:
Word is making the rounds
That your food features soil — that’s the dirt.

A guy in the mood for a bite
Was upset — not one rest’rant in sight.
All he found was a deli
Whose odor was smelly.
Did he live through his meal there? Not quite.


My date dropped dessert on the dirt.
“Please don’t eat it,” I managed to blurt,
As he started to chew
On his now blackened goo,
Saying “5-second rule — it won’t hurt.”

A bathroom-bound man felt sub-par
After eating an energy bar.
He exclaimed, “Sticky wicket!
I’ve just eaten cricket!
Insect protein is going too far!”

There's rather a paucity of girls on D & A, so welcome, Madeleine!

I'm not afraid to employ the 5-second rule (in my own kitchen, at least ;) )

Jayne

Yes, welcome Madeleine. I wish we could entice Fiona Pitt-Kethley (now in foreign parts). She was, and is, an ace with rhymes. Used to win these competitions too. She penned this gem. Do excuse the rudery.

Emily Bronte
Took her crayons by Conte
And drew pricks, cunts and balls
On the Parsonage walls.

Can someone else do the accents?

Emily Brönte
Took her crayons by Conté
And drew pricks, cunts and balls
On the Parsonage walls.

There you go, John. (To do an é you press ctrl alt and e at the same time. I transported the ö from Word ('Insert' then 'symbol'; easy peasy!)

Jayne

John, you are right. I've just blasted the superfluous "can" into oblivion.

Jayne and John, thanks for the warm welcome!

Paul, it's good to see a familiar face. Okay, face is probably not the right word, but still...

Robert Schechter has spoken highly of your group on several occasions. I'm glad I finally stopped by.

Thank you, Jayne. I LOVE that Clerihew. The picture it conjures up!

On the other hand, if you can think of another word that rhymes with 'national' and 'rational' ... (BA)

Not really, Brian, but maybe you could change the venue?

With globalisation so thorough
Horse now tops the bill in my borough,
But I stifled a tear
As I though how, last year,
My 'prime Angus' romped home at the Curragh.

Yes, welcome, Madeleine. I'm surprised that one of our esteemed moderators has not expressed his pleasure on learning that cricketing expressions are now current among New Yorkers. Perhaps you've figuratively yorked him.