Eratosphere

Eratosphere (https://www.ablemuse.com/erato/index.php)
-   Drills & Amusements (https://www.ablemuse.com/erato/forumdisplay.php?f=30)
-   -   New Statesman -- food limericks -- March 7 deadline (https://www.ablemuse.com/erato/showthread.php?t=19885)

Mary McLean 02-22-2013 03:48 AM

Welcome Madeleine! This is a fun place to hang out, I hope you enjoy it.

So you found equine alveoli
In your chili, and now shepherd’s pie.
Did it not give to you
A bit of a clue
That the company name is BirdsEye?

John Whitworth 02-22-2013 04:09 AM

I am, Jerome, extremely glad to hear it. Perhaps Americans will give up rounders and take to the real game. Women play too. You can see them on television, bless their little pony tails.

Brian Allgar 02-22-2013 12:49 PM

They say that you are what you eat,
And consumers of lamb tend to bleat.
So something was fake
When two lovers of steak
Finished Cheltenham in a dead heat.

************************************

The prize-winnng chef’s keeping mum,
For the Michelin critics have come.
Though he makes no admissions,
His secret addition’s
A dollop of Pedigree Chum.

Madeleine Begun Kane 02-22-2013 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jerome Betts (Post 275401)
Yes, welcome, Madeleine. I'm surprised that one of our esteemed moderators has not expressed his pleasure on learning that cricketing expressions are now current among New Yorkers. Perhaps you've figuratively yorked him.

Jerome, thanks for the welcome! I wasn't consciously aware that I knew any cricketing expressions. But when you're writing a limerick and desperate for a rhyme, you never know what will pop out of the recesses of your brain.

Mary, thanks for the welcome. I'm sure I'll enjoy it here!

Roger Slater 02-22-2013 05:43 PM

The chef, whose cuisine was Italian,
Would cook with both garlic and scallion
And pasta aplenty
(He'd serve it al dente),
But his secret ingredient? Stallion.

Jerome Betts 02-23-2013 03:43 AM

Nice one, Roger.

A dairyman watering milk
Said, "My aim's not to profit or bilk.
I avoid common tap
Full of chlorine and crap
And use Spa for a blend smooth as silk.'


A trader who lived in Dundalk
Was the subject of slanderous talk.
His cheap cheese,'For The Saver',
Had a strange gritty flavour
Which his rivals suggested was chalk.

Brian Allgar 02-23-2013 07:06 AM

Very neat, Roger, although not "neat".

Roger Slater 02-23-2013 07:55 AM

Thanks!


One more:

The racehorse had all that it takes
To win, four strong legs and no brakes,
But after he passed
He finished dead last
So they served him as fine Belmont steaks.

Douglas G. Brown 02-23-2013 03:28 PM

Roger,
This puts you ahead of the rest of the posts here by at least half a length.

Edmund Conti 02-23-2013 04:02 PM

The sirloin? A great work of art.
Both the chef and the horse did his part.
But what gave it away
And made me say nay
Was the sound and the smell of my fart.

Neigh or nay?


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:50 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.