"Hillary Clinton to Show More Humor and Heart, Aides Say" NY Times, Sept 7, 2015

Sillery, chillery,
Candidate Hillary
Cranks up the warmth as her
Numbers go south;

Never a hot number,
Cool as a cucumber,
Oleomargarine
Froze in her mouth.

(recycled from last winter)

That's a nice one, Douglas. Silly of me to have had this not in its rightful Hillary repository.

Pin the Dirt on the Clinton: A Long-Standing Tradition

Hillary calumny shocks,
They store up slurs like rocks.
The rocks honed big for Bill
Bombard on Clinton still:
If one Fox anchor talks
Hillary's pillory locks.
a

"There is no free lunch," the Donald's implying.
His campaign's imploding, his numbers are dying.
I'm voting for Clinton, since there's no denying,
Why pay for my lunch, while the Government's buying.

When the phone rings at three in the morning,
Will the country go down in defeat?
Never! Trump issues a warning:
Make just one wrong move and I'll tweet!

The Donald Trumps Himself?
 

True, Presidential candidates
Have sometimes tempted all the Fates
With shady deals and dodgy mates
Or drugs and debts and too much booze
Or made the not-so-welcome news
Through gaffes in TV interviews
Much like the Donald, yes? Well, nope,
It's greasy overtures 'n' grope
Which may just sink him, let us hope.

WIKILEAKS – Assange destroys Clinton!
 

WIKILEAKS – Julian Assange destroys Hillary Clinton!

I’m surprised she hasn’t already withdrawn from the election. The leaked documents mercilessly show that:

- She is in FAVOUR of making America a more just society!

- She is in FAVOUR of regulating the banks and Wall Street to prevent another crash like the one in 2008!

- She is in FAVOUR of making financial people accountable for their actions!

- She is in FAVOUR of closing interest loopholes and addressing the problem of skyrocketing CEO salaries!

- She is in FAVOUR of some form of universal health care!

For his great public service in bringing all these horrors to light, I can only thank Julian Assange in the following terms:

So that was the great revelation
To end Clinton’s bid for the nation?
Poor Assange! His “big hit”
Is worth less than the shit
Of a gnat with acute constipation.

Donald Trump prepares for the next debate
 

Donald Trump prepares for the next debate

“Preparing’s too much of a grind,
So I’ll just say what comes to my mind.
If it’s insults and lies,
They’ll still give me the prize –
My supporters are deaf, dumb and blind.”

Donald Trump’s “Tax losses”

“Lost a billion? That’s nothin’, just wait
Till I get my fat paws on the state.
The ’29 crash
Will be peanuts – the cash
Will make this American great.”

No Such Silly-Billery, Hillary, please

Don't keep the White House cigars
Where Jagger once kept his Mars Bars.
With its smoothe, silky coating all meltingly tanned
A Mars in a bush is worth two in a hand
And its flavour's a lingual delight.
But cigars from the lips of an intern
May well be too damp to ignite.

The Groining of America?

A lady who sadly recalls
A shameless proposer of walls
xxSaid, "It's one thing to flirt,
xxBut a hand up your skirt ?
If he tries it on you, TWIST HIS https://ssl.gstatic.com/mail/emoji/6...oji_u1f573.pnghttps://ssl.gstatic.com/mail/emoji/6...oji_u1f573.png!"

Trump and Chump Rhymes
 

I.
He claims he'll make the state look good as gold,
Whose hissy-fits would pale a four-year-old.

II.
That such an animal could rise so far
Lays bare how many birdbrained fools there are.

III.
Seems Plato sent this bozo troll to stalk
Too close to power and Hillary, to mock
How mobs with volatile moods vote as they please,
Molded to be their own worst enemies.
Democracy's a many-headed beast;
If not a beast, of many heads at least.
h

Playwright, Poet and Spy
 

Oxford says Shakespeare will share credit for Henry VI.

The Bard was not a solo act;
It seems that Marlowe had his back.

Ode to climate-change deniers
 

Ode to climate-change deniers

This global warming wouldn’t be a problem
If only Planet Earth were nice and flat.
The rising seas would flow towards the edges,
And trickle into space. That would be that.

Unfortunately, that is not the case;
Most of us now accept the world is round.
New Yorkers, if you’re living in Trump Tower,
You’ll be OK. If not, you’ll all be drowned.

An American Sentence
 

It's very hard to take to heart, a name that in English slang means fart.

Yes! Hello there another-Annie. Welcome to the asylum.

I remember the fun my kids had playing Top Trumps according to their own particular rules. One for a freep, two for a phot and a variable score for a triple flutterblast depending on duration.

Thank you! Lol at least that shows initiative even if it's not the sort of thing you can brag about to your friends at Dinner parties :)

On a line by Philip Larkin

Buses-turned-billboards and digital dazzlers
telephone robots and internet popups,
relentlessly blaring their one-message song:
Come and choose wrong, they cry, come and choose wrong.

Spielers and spindoctors, hucksters and hackers,
disinformationists, liars-for-hire,
belt it out urgently, loudly and long:
Come and choose wrong! Come and choose wrong!

Fellow Americans, fellow-consumers,
post it on Facebook and tweet it on Twitter,
exercise Freedom to show you belong:
COME
CHOOSE
WRONG.

Damned Dominion!
 

Reading the Obits

My one complaint:
First we are
And then we ain’t.

Breaking news – fbi find more emails
 

(Spoiler: To all reality-challenged Republican voters, this is a JOKE)

BREAKING NEWS – FBI FIND MORE EMAILS

An unnamed source within the FBI stated that they are currently investigating thousands of emails found in a computer belonging to the late great-aunt of a woman who went to a school less than five miles from the one attended by Hillary Clinton (née Rodham) when she was seven years old.

The agent said: “To date, we’ve found nothing but recipes for Pecan Pie, Chocolate Brownies, and similar stuff. However, the recipes could be coded messages, so we’ve got our best cryptographers working on them. They got quite excited when they discovered that “Celery and Chilli Soup” is an anagram of “Hillary lied – C. pounces”, and pointed out that “C” could be Comey. Unfortunately, the email is dated 1972, when Mr. Comey was twelve years old, which makes it unlikely. So we haven’t yet found anything incriminating, but we’re still hoping.”

This Former Citizen's Reaction To The Latest News

America is over! Thank the mob
That likes a boorish, bigoted doorknob!
From every fiber of my being, I
Resent him in the street who'd like that guy.
Most never thought, their sad vocation school's
Busywork, an assembly line for fools;
Their Worldview turns Reality TV,
Their mind is vegetative, dead to me.
Am I American? Well, from the core
I never did despise a nation more!

Erik, that's a terrific poem. It moved me very much.

I am trying to console myself with a hollow laugh at one of History's better (bitter?) ironies.

As over the soul of our nations
The swastika is unfurled
It did made me chuckle
That Angela Merkel
Is left to lead the Free World…

What next, I wonder? Presidente LePen?

[Ooops, wrong thread. Moved.]

Trump’s Sonnet?

I’ll want it
spy on it
step on it
hop on it

then Don it
cheat on it
and con it
to pawn it

tweet on it
sigh on it
cry on it
lie on it

vie on it
win on it!


Alternate Q + 1

sit on it
shit on it
piss on it
spit on it

whine on it