The Staggers: The Next Challenge
 

The next challenge
No 4143 Set by Leonora Casement

We'd like a poem from Gerard Manley Hopkins, Yeats or Coleridge on any aspect of the coalition government.
Max 16 lines by 9 September
comp@newstatesman.co.uk

Well, since it's raining at Lord's Ive been working on this. And now I'll be thnking about Eric Pickles, the fattest man in the cabinet, and a favourite of mine.

.The next challenge
No 4143 Set by Leonora Casement

We'd like a poem from Gerard Manley Hopkins, Yeats or Coleridge on any aspect of the coalition government.
Max 16 lines by 9 September
comp@newstatesman.co.uk

It's raining at Lord's so I've been knitting this. And now I'll try one on Eric Pickles, the fattest cabinet minister and a Yorkshireman to boot. Rough beast.. slouches...

Cleggmania Cured

Cleggie, are you quaking
Over promises a-breaking?
Bobby-dazzling on the telly
Deliquescing into jelly?
With the Labour luvvies baying,
Sabotaging what you’re saying,
With the teeny-boppers booing,
Cos you don’t know what you’re doing,
With the Beeb expending time on
Smarming up to Simple Simon,
With the boozers and the blaggers
And the fellows at The Staggers,
All united in their judging
That you’re feeble and you’re fudging,
As the ghost of Gladstone sits up,
And the wunderkind goes tits up.

not exactly coleridge, but...
 

No 4143

On Airstrip One did Cameron
A hybrid cabinet decree,
Where Nicholas, the put-upon,
Found all his erstwhile virtues gone
To ruinous débris.

Stout couple, with a scheme in mind
To weather the financial storm!
Who thus unequally combined
Processed ahead, but left behind
Electoral reform.

Their bold and ruthless tactics, meant
To plunder welfare to the core,
Plumbed novel depths in government.
They bought the wealthy's debt and sent
The invoice to the poor.

Removed for reasons of common sense.

Did you know, Allen, that we are no longer subjects on our passports but bloody citizens, like we were Americans or Frenchies or something? It was the doing of the last Government, may they rot in Hell, the lot of them.