I would like to see villanelles that are advertisements for consumer products--the repetition of french forms dovetails neatly with the value of repetition in advertising.

Must villanelles be IP, or will any meter do?

------------------

Svein Olav

.. another life

Junkmail Junkie


I’ve found a way to shop for what I need
without the hassle of a crowded mall.
My email has more ads than I can read.

This morning’s mail contained the hottest lead
from inside Wall Street. ( I click on them all.)
I’ve found a way to shop for what I need.

Give up your day job! You, too, can succeed.
The sky’s the limit—nothing to install;
just email ads to all who care to read.

Overweight? Does your hairline or penis recede?
You’ll meet the nicest girls; you’ll have a ball;
Just shop the internet for what you need.

Insurance? Eligibility’s guaranteed,
no questions asked; no wait, no physical.
More opportunities than I can read!

I’ve had my breasts enlarged, my credit freed.
A brand new college diploma hangs on my wall.
It's the only way to shop for what I need—
my email has more ads than I can read.


Carol Taylor
10/6/01

Metrical, not necessarily IP.

Carol, impressed by your references, may I hire you as my shopping consultant? Funny stuff!

------------------
Ralph

Carol's villanelle inspired me to commit the following -- no blame should attach to her, however.

Ancient Self-Help Manual -- half price!

Stoic thought is all you need,
So buy this book by Epictetus—
Satisfaction guaranteed!

You don’t need cigarettes or speed
Or Tex-Mex food with Margaritas—
Stoic thought is all you need.

Desire is like a choking weed
To root it out, just read this treatise!
Your satisfaction’s guaranteed.

We don’t need silks or Harris Tweed
Or love and friendship to complete us--
Stoic thought is all we need.

Grief is nothing more than greed:
That which composed us may delete us.
Our satisfaction’s guaranteed

If we can love what Fate’s decreed—
Love every horror sent to greet us.
Stoics think that’s all we need:
Our satisfaction guaranteed.

Of course, Elizabeth Bishop in her villanelle "One Art" does a much better job with this theme -- makes a real poem out of it. Oh well.



[This message has been edited by ChrisW (edited October 09, 2001).]

Well Carol: This exercise certainly had you inspired. I was convinced you were reading my email. Stanza 4 in particular made me laugh and laugh. It does go in cycles and I am currently in a "Get your credit restored"/"Increase your penis size" period (hmmm--there must be a link there somewhere).

Two nits:

--2nd stanza. Agreement? "lead"--"on them all."

--3rd stanza. Why not a second exclamation point in that first line?

Otherwise I marvel at your zingy ear and wit. Though I still wanna know how you have been reading my email. ;)

nyctom

I hope it's not bad form to post a second funexcise in the same thread. People are free to ignore it, I guess.

This one is a personal ad, but not not an ad for a consumer product (my last one was for a particular book -- maybe that can squeak through).


VGL GM seeks same*
Athletic, well-endowed a +.
Write me. This is not a game.

Be masculine! Don't flit or flame!
A six-pack would be faaabulous!
VGL GM seeks same.

You: hot and built and far from tame
Yet tender and monogamous.
Write me. This is not a game

For fats and fems, the halt or lame!
Remember that my heading was:
VGL GM seeks same.

You must be young enough to claim
That you're my son--I'm generous,
So write me. (This is not a game

For people with a sense of shame)
Vulgar and libidinous
VGL GM seeks same.
Tell me this is not a game.

*For those not familiar with personal ad-speak, the repeated shorthand "VGL GM" means "Very Good Looking Gay Man" -- but don't pronounce it that way or the meter will be spoiled (more than it is already)!

(I made some alterations in this in response to Tom's critique. I may yet come back and fix it some more.)



[This message has been edited by ChrisW (edited October 15, 2001).]

Clearing House


YOU TOO COULD WIN A MILLION!! (That is, if
you hold the number somethingorotherone
and beat the odds.) Dream on, poor working stiff,

of parties at the Mansion, meeting Hef . . .
Read about it in Playboy! Can be done!
YOU TOO COULD WIN A MILLION!! That is, if

you've taken Brogue and Mayan Hieroglyph,
or maybe seven years of Modern Nun,
and beat the odds. Ah, dream on, working stiff,

and to help you dream, subscribe to Surf and Cliff
("Vacation Get-a-Ways that Really Stun!").
YOU TOO COULD WIN A MILLION!! That is, if

those ten subscriptions -- Cooking with Jam & Jif ? --
shorten the odds enough (you simpleton).
You'll beat the odds, so dream on, working stiff.

The Prize Patrol? Ha! Pick up a handkerchief
and conjure rabbits from the air. (What fun.)
YOU TOO COULD WIN A MILLION!! That is, if
you beat the odds. Dream on, poor working stiff . . .


Jan



[This message has been edited by Jan D. Hodge (edited October 09, 2001).]

Wadda hoot, Jan! And it reminded me to renew my subsrciption to Modern Nun--oh, those sassy sisters.

------------------
Ralph