Poems from Howlers
 

Marilyn Taylor’s malapropism poem on TDE shows a howler skewing the world slightly, startling us into a different way of thinking - as poems often do. There’s an inexhaustible supply of boo-boos out there to write poems about - why not have a go? Here’s my starter:



CIRCUS POLKA

Stravinsky wrote the polka
for one of the younger
elephants in Barnum and
Bailey’s circus who had
commissioned the piece
Record sleeve note

O Barnum jumbo,
elephant rare,
commission me!
I’ve musical flair -
Stravinsky’s stuff
is cold and spare,
(he even steals,
March Militaire).

You’ll like my polka,
brass will blare
round circus rings
(round never square)
for I will write
with grateful care,
and you will dance
like Fred Astaire.

Holly that's just brilliant ;-)

It's too late here for me to drum something up and I will never be able to faintly match yours.
Janet

I guess the most famous of this genre would be Elizabeth Bishop's Man-Moth (from a misprint of mammoth)...

Sorry, We’re Open!
(A sign seen at a kiosk behind the Blue Mosque, Istanbul, 2004)

Beware of God,
Americans!
We do not mean
To bother you
With carpet sales,
Go Trespassing!

Never having been averse to blowing my own trumpet here's a little thing from my EXCELLENT book 'Bing the Bad Guy':

How Many?

The first line is from ‘Bushisms’, a little yellow book everyone should own.

How many hands have I shaked?
How many geese have I cuken?
How many bribes have I taked?
How many lies have I puken?
How many promises breaked?
How many enemies nuken?

How many saves have I baconen?
How many bulls have I shatted?
How many earths have I quakenen?
How many highs have I hatted
How many grasses bin snakenen?
How many scenes bin well quatted?

How many warms have I freezened?
How many nonsenses natteren?
How many palms have I greasened?
How many truths have I ratteren?
How many reasons unreasoned?
How many stinking fish batteren?

How many documents fakenen?
How many treaties forgotted?
How many bad guys outstakenen?
How many terrorists potted?
How many widows upwakenen?
How many kiddikins shotted?

Fantastically funny, John!!! Thanks.

Thank you, Mary. I ought to say that though Bing was, very possibly, a bad guy - his children didn't like him much, though has they been less talentless layabouts... and he seems to have screwed Hope out of monwey,though is that necessarily so bad... and he certainly was a slaughterer of wild fowl big time ... nevertheless the book I mentioned is ACTUALLY Being the Bad Guy.

John,

I can't tell you how much I prefer Bing the Bad Guy. I won't even try, but I'll tell you I didn't even go to the Crosby reference.

Rick

Oh.
I'm so disappointed it isn't Bing the Bad Guy.

Church Bulletin

Which inspires more penitence:
the thought of "Cannon Law",
or the thought of "Alter Servers"?
Yikes. It's pretty much a draw.