Marion, I love this, all of it and indeed your ending, being his lawer, which is very funny, but, the ending IS consequential, adding a major dimension to your story, if you put in some other trite element, or even adding some trite comment after the lawyer bit, if you want to keep that, I think it would be inconsequential enough to win.
I think.
Anyway, best of luck.
Jim
Last edited by Jim Hayes; 04-07-2009 at 12:43 PM.
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