I don't understand the question.
Your only responsibility when critiquing is to try to say something useful in a useful manner. The precise tone with which you convey your remarks is up to you, provided it is not purposely cruel or dishonestly kind. Don't patronize the poet by supposing that your views are so crucial that they could induce either bad feelings or bad revisions.
But I suppose we all knew that already. So I guess I don't understand the question.
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