John, very funny, but it left me feeling that biscuits can use some defending from your unfair accusations, so:
The Uses of Biscuits
How do I use thee? Let me count the ways.
I use thee as a snack that seems just right
Most mornings, afternoons, and late at night,
When served on paper napkins or on trays.
I use thee as the balm of every day's
Most quiet need, to slake my appetite.
I use thee daily, pausing for a bite.
I use thee plainly, with or without glaze.
I use thee with the passion put to use
When I was still as slender as a wraith.
I use thee with the love I'd never lose
As I grew stout. I use thee with the breath,
Tastes, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,
I'll use thee still in heaven after death.
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