God May Forgive You
[God may forgive you but I never can: Queen Elizabeth I]
For Jesus there can be no final straw:
The Saviour welcomes every Sinner in,
And loves the Sinner, though He hates the Sin,
But that’s His job and that’s what Heaven’s for.
Down here it’s time for totting up the score:
I’ve stuck to you like glue through thick and thin
And, let me tell you, thin is what it’s been
For years, for bloody years – not any more.
Have I found someone else? Why should I want to?
Simply to spend my money might be nice.
Further acquaintance with the dogs you’ve gone to
I just don’t need, and ditto your advice,
But what I do need is your absence pronto,
So bugger off. Don’t make me tell you twice.
Comment by Mr. Gwynn:
I haven’t seen this one before, but its voice is unmistakable (If I’m wrong about the author’s identity then I too should bugger off). The easy handling of cliche piled on cliche (“stuck to you like glue through thick and thin”) followed by the surprise twist of the blade (“And, let me tell you, thin is what it’s been / For years, for bloody years”) is, lacking a better term, a hoot. We can all learn something from “Further acquaintance with the dogs you gone to” about the little ups and downs of diction that can make poetic idiom so delightful. The rhymes, of course, especially the feminine ones, are flawless. I suppose I should say something negative. Ok, maybe the commas in l. 7 aren’t necessary.