John's already produced the winner, so I thought I'd just play a rhyming game:
How do I hate you? Let me count the ways.
On Monday, most dispiriting of days,
I’ll cheer myself by whispering harsh dispraise
Of you and yours. Next day I’ll hone a phrase
Whose every cruel syllable will faze
Your mind, disorient and craze.
On Wednesday, I’ll infect you with malaise,
And Thursday’s when my gibes will so amaze
Your slow, dull wits, you’ll stagger in a daze
And learn there is no comfort that allays
So huge a hurt. On Friday I’ll erase
Your credit rating – then no more soft plays!
On Saturday with quiet glee I’ll raise
My boot to kick you, vicious as the Krays,
Till Sunday, when I’ll be at church, to praise
The God who’ll fry and burn you. How you’ll blaze!
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