It seems like a pretty exacting form and difficult to pull off. And that is what strikes me about it -- it satisfies an exacting form, and does so well. But I wonder if a better poem might be made of the same stuff minus the pattern of repetitions. I guess I am a bit of repeating forms curmudgeon or something, but I think it is hard in the world of repeating forms not to draw attention to the artifice of the poem, which is no automatic sin, but makes it hard to pull off a poem where the content holds its own with the form. IMO.
David R.
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