View Single Post
  #44  
Unread 11-14-2011, 04:36 PM
Roger Slater Roger Slater is online now
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 16,726
Default

Allen, I thought shabby/Abbey would be a fun rhyme for the two stanzas. There are many different ways to go if it turns out not to be kosher to have a feminine rhyme there, but your solution, I'm afraid, messes up the meter throughout. Your last three lines don't even start with dactyls, and your lines 3 and 6 don't end with dactyls.
Reply With Quote