That's great, John.
I'd leave L5 as you have it, as 'oodles' and 'shedloads' are too similar to have both.
Could the last stanza go something like:
They tuck you up, your ma and pa,
With lovely cocoa in large mugs.
They make you feel that you're a star,
So give them thanks, and lots of hugs.
It cuts out one 'They' (not that that's a problem) but I think it ought to round off like the penultimate stanza does, exhorting the offspring to be bloody grateful!
Just a thought.
Jayne