[Martin Parker]

My love is like a tin from Heinz.
She's 57 sorts
of recipes which, she opines,
spice amatory sports.

Her product range, it seems, commands
a wide enough variety
for satisfying Love's demands
for tantric male satiety.

Now old, I find a single kiss
enough for amatory heaven.
But she's proposed a night of bliss
with products one to fifty-seven.

Imagine, if you can, the spot
of bother I'll be in
surviving while she does just what
it says upon the tin.