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Unread 07-10-2005, 10:47 AM
Tom Jardine Tom Jardine is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 1,501
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I am beginning to see what this poem is about. = Have you been taking your medicine?

You have written better poems than this. = You have written better poems than this in your previous life.

This poem needs a little more action, more liveliness. = How long have you been dead?

I was saddened to read this poem about the tragic, slow death of your 99 year-old father. = Well, that certainly was gruesome! Please, no more dead relative poems.

I love the many classical references in this poem. = So, I see you haven't had many real tragedies in your own life yet. Just wait.



[This message has been edited by Tom Jardine (edited July 10, 2005).]
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