If you a looking for a well-written memoir with an interesting history to relate, then put down this book immediately. No, writing's not my thing, and if it were, I'd have nothing to write about since my life has been dull, and even if my life hadn't been dull, I'd refuse to boast about my accomplishments like some of those snooty bios where people say stuff like, "Oooh! Look at me! I was Prime Minister of England!" Or "Oooh! Look at me! I cured a disease!" I wasn't prime minister of anything and I never cured anything, not even a slab of meat, and I resent it when other people tell me they're better than I am. Bastards.
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