Damn the rubric, here's Ivy Compton Burnett
'It appears that I have won the lottery.' Hereward Attwater announced to his family over breakfast.
'I do not like the ambiguity in that sentence.' said Letitia, his wife.
'The enormity and improbability of the eventuality seem to conspire against my believing it.'
'Are we to be rich, Father?' Eve, the youngest of the children, asked.
'We are already that,' admonished Letitia, 'but now we may be richer.'
'Then the change is not absolute, merely a matter of degree.'
'Nevertheless, the degree is not inconsiderable. I have checked my numbers against those listed in the newspaper and found that they correspond exactly.'
'It would be vulgar to wonder how much was the prize.'
'No, Letitia, it would be human to wonder. It would be vulgar to ask. Besides, my sharing news of my good fortune should not be mistaken for an intention to share that fortune.'
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