Childhood
I like the run-on, one-sentence feel of it - really captures the non-stop excitement of childhood. However, I would argue that the "sentence" is really more of a fragment, a fragment that would be completed by a title of "Childhood is. . ." The image of a garter snake over the hand is very appealing (and cringeworthy at the same time), and I also like just the idea of the "lie without purpose" - the play on lie, etc - as the child is certainly lying to the parent about what she is doing, or not doing, in the case of the list of errands.
I think this is a short piece that most of us could relate to - at least, I know that memories of my childhood were evoked during the reading of this poem. I like the notion that the child, though obviously a girl, is seen as more androgynous, both boy and girl, which I think also captures the essence of being a child. The volta is present as a physical division - the fence that is jumped over - that fence that also represents the division of the child's world from the world of the adults (mother, school, etc.).
I think it is clever and well done. I am excited to see what else comes along.
Sean
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