Quote:
Originally Posted by Brian Allgar
I'd been thinking of writing a poem explaining how to assemble an Ikea table, but realized that such a piece would be entirely incomprehensible.
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Still, here it is, or something like it:
Instruction manual (printed in China)
Congratulations! You are just about
To build this stunning self-assembly kit.
Although the manual’s clear beyond a doubt,
You may complain that nothing seems to fit,
But that’s because you’ve mixed screws ‘J’ and ‘K’.
It’s easy to confuse them - at first sight,
They look the same, but actually, screw ‘J’
Is threaded right-to-left, ‘K’ left-to-right.
Piece ‘X’ must be inserted in slot ‘G’,
Though not before you’ve put the bolt marked ‘U’
Into the hole that’s been misprinted ‘P’
(It should be ‘F’) and tightened wing-nut ‘Q’.
You say the task is testing you severely?
Well, if you think that nothing could be trickier
Than using this assembly kit, then clearly
You’ve never made a table bought from Ikea!