Shoot. I was hoping "Balance" would be more of a hit. But what can I say. If a poem doesn't grab you, it doesn't grab you. What I find interesting, though, is that the reasons people have been giving for not liking it tend to be the reasons I like it. For instance, I tend to like the sort of mixed diction effects that stop nyctom in his tracks--I have to smile at a sonnet ending "whup her ass" (and I like the unobtrusive nonce rime scheme too).
I agree that third-person narrative does run a risk of not seeming "personally felt" in the way that lyric or persona poems do, and many such narratives (which are popular these days), do indeed fail to catch my interest. Even in "Homeplace" I tend to skip around. But for me, again, part of the reason "Balance" works is exactly the distance (and the appearance of the vernacular in iambic pentameter). Hmmm. Well, no need to belabor the point... De gustibus, as they say.
nyctom--you're welcome to revive the "bashing the greats" thread if you like. I know we all have poets we ought to admire but just can't get any purchase on.
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