I think this is effective and affecting. The octave does a good job of creating the sense of perception blearing over, moving from the jolting sounds in the opening lines to the smoothed-over sounds later. Maybe my favorite moment of the poem, technique-wise, is "wheel him, / unwilling," the sense of dragging and resistance in that. I like Maryann’s idea of the em dash after "wait," although I’d also have liked an ellipsis before that word: "She’s . . . wait—" As it stands, it takes a moment to get what’s intended.
The situation is utterly realistic. I once worked at a nursing home, and an old man named Charlie every evening would wander the hallway, sometimes exiting the place altogether, to look for his sheep to make sure they were safe. In his life, in fact he'd been a shepherd.
This is a skillfully made and heart-felt piece, easily my favorite so far.
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