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Unread 05-13-2014, 04:03 PM
Christine Whittemore Christine Whittemore is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Gloucestershire, UK.
Posts: 541
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As everyone else, I think this is the best so far, it flows well and skillfully. I like the abrupt colloquialism "children don't know beans." The description of aging is good. (Am surprised to hear more than one person saying "crepey" skin seems close to the word "creepy" to them, as crepey is such a well-known--though still effective--adjective for old skin that I'd never have thought about "creepy" at all!)

I too am not sure about the "Before."

But most of all, I feel let down by the last line, which feels to me awkward somehow....
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