Dancing leek to leek? How can one compete with that?
“You should dance more in the kitchen.
You would find it most enrichin’,”
he declared to his dear Betty
as she stood there hot and sweaty.
“Leave that mango, let us tango,
let us trip the light fandango.
Swap the juices of the oven
for some music and some lovin’.
Oh, your dishes are delicious,
so capricious and nutritious,
but mere food is not enough, dear, to sustain us.”
But, flush-faced, she turned round suddenly
and he quickstepped somewhat woodenly
to the A & E in Tintern
to inform a giggling intern
how he’d got a wooden spoon stuck up his anus.
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