Thread: The Jitterbug
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Unread 10-23-2016, 09:24 AM
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Martin Rocek Martin Rocek is offline
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There’s a lot going on here: N’s special memory with the loss of detail and perhaps accuracy set up in S1, N’s parents’ memory of better times evoked by a song, their underlying connection that endures through their “quiet” wars—a lot to pack into 14 lines. Still, I think there are a few weak points—in S2, I’m bothered by “now” and the inversion L12-13. But with a bit of buffing, I’m sure that this multifaceted gem can be polished up.
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