[Alexandra Baez]

I really enjoy this poem, Michael. The language is imaginative and visceral, and the meter is self-assured, raising only one uncertainty for me, below. The rhyme structure is interesting—the envelopes create an apt sense of resolutions being held in abeyance, while the repeated rhymes underscore the sense of the sea’s inexorability, and the couplets bring an air of slightly distanced commentary to the first and third stanzas, while in the second one, they maintain more of the active feel of the bulk, which seems fitting in this middle position. And yes, of course, the evocation of the mentality of the n is compelling.

Coming in late, I have the luxury of scraping the text for anything remaining to nit about. This might be one:

But now it’s stripped, and we watch fearfully

I’m not sure that the double trochee (as I perceive it) at the end of this line is the most effective use of language. My first reaction was to trip over the meter. My second reaction was to argue with myself over whether this trip enhanced the meaning somehow, or had an endearingly colloquial feel. I almost--but not quite--convinced myself that this variation did one or both of these things.

It’s interesting how just as you say

exposed the past - an ancient scow now rears
its head, and trapped between huge rocks appears

I feel as if I’m being tossed into the 19th century by the language itself. I love it!

I also like the double iamb in the second of these lines.

However,

to grapple to repress a jagged grin

sounds a bit weird to my ears because I’ve never heard the construction “grapple to.” I’m accustomed to “grapple with,” and Merriam-Webster’s usage example is one of this sort.

We’ll pile massive block on block as high
as gulls can fly to stifle and repel
the crush of tides, the awful dead fish smell.

Would you consider adding a comma after “fly” here? Without it, one could momentarily mistakenly take this passage to mean that the gulls will be flying in order to stifle and repel said things themselves.

But again, I really like this.