[Glenn Wright]

Hi, mignon—

Lovely sonnet in the tradition of what the Germans call the Dinggedicht or “thing poem.” You present a collection of objects in a way that reveals an important clue to the soul of each object’s owner and to the speaker. For example, you show the speaker’s mother to be refined and artistic by the objects showing her interest in table settings and flower arranging. You show the speaker’s son and grandson to share musical talent and passionate characters. Could you think about presenting fewer objects and showing how each object is a key to understanding its owner and the relationships among the family members?

I like the slant rhymes: vase/plays, jug/egg, nude/mud, and I especially like the last line. I imagine the photos of the family members arranged in ascending generations like ranks of angels—thrones, powers, cherubim, seraphim. Many of the women might be wearing white wedding dresses or first communion dresses with veils like wings. They add a heart-warming feeling of protectiveness and order.

You might consider a different title. As Roger pointed out, a chimney is a structure on a roof. It seems that you are advertising a poem about objects on a mantel, but you include a piano, couch, and étagère. Maybe use the name of the room as the title? Or choose something that ties in with your great angel image?

In line 8, do you mean that the speaker sees the future “make new space” for the objects, or “make new owners” for them (or “make new uses” for them)? If it makes new space, that implies that some of them are disappearing.

Very fine work!
Glenn