Lovely revision, Mignon. The long lines didn’t bother me, but you’ve trimmed them to good advantage: it’s now clear that father and grandpa were the same person, and “fossil mud” is neater and prettier. You’ve told me about the guitar, but it still strikes me as odd to have the experience of your grandson singing and playing the piano summed up as “guitar and passion.” It doesn’t seem to have bothered anyone else, though, so never mind me.
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