[Glenn Wright]

Hi, Paula—

I like your central trope of the homeowners’ association doing battle with the armed forces of nature. I’m having some trouble, however, scanning a few of the lines or visualizing the images. Here are the problem lines and some suggested fixes:

Line 1: No matter how I read it, I only get four stresses. How about
How tidy! How clean! This wealthy subdivision—

Line 4: In modern usage “next” is used with “to” rather than by itself as a preposition. Maybe
next to manicured lawns by fences surrounded. or maybe
by manicured lawns with fences surrounded
Carl will almost certainly ding you for the inversion, but I’m OK with it.

Line 11: I can force this into IP, but “lil Katie” sounds more like a rapper than a cute little girl. How about
Now down the street our tomboy, Katie, goes

Line 14: if she’s blowing on the dandelion clock, it would be grayish-white, not yellow.

I enjoyed the gently subversive humor and heartwarming images of the child. Nice work!

Glenn