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Wilmette Warzone
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06-19-2024, 07:32 PM
Roger Slater
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: New York
Posts: 16,727
I like this. A bit old fashioned, but the inversions seem to fit the intended tone rather than to be a sign of lazy writing. I'd omit the adjective before Katie's name. Let her just be Katie. We soon enough learn in the couplet that she is a child.
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