It's an unnatural effort for me to say "fire" as exactly one syllable, so the meter of that line has a bump for me. Would you consider "sack" or "can" or something like that?
The poem is well made, but doesn't really do much poem-y stuff other than use rhyme and meter. You call it a "satiric" critique, but it doesn't seem satiric to me, just a straightforward indictment of the corporate mindset as it applies to its workers.
Try sending it to the Harvard Business Review, or something like that.
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