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Unread 12-16-2024, 04:33 PM
Joe Crocker Joe Crocker is offline
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Hi Matt

As Glenn said this is very well done. It reads and rhymes beautifully but it also feels natural and unforced. And that's hard to pull off.

I think some of Richard's nits are explained because you have a conditional subjunctive mood going on. I'm thinking that "site" in S2L4 is a reference to a new graveyard, one of those ecological types where they don't have headstones but do have wildlife.

A couple of nits. "Tasked" S2L1 is one of those new verbs that the English language has adopted without checking with me first. Could you not say "asked"?

And S3L1 "who" should be "whom"?
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