[Joe Crocker]

Welcome to the ’sphere Trevor. I can see you have been putting in a heavy shift of critiques, so thank you for picking up my poem.

I have been working on it since my last revision here, and have sent versions of it to a couple of places. So I won’t engage in a detailed discussion with you just now. Just to say you have made some valuable points that I will take into account when the rejections come back.

You are right that the poem goes over some well worn themes, and childhood memories of snow are bound to be difficult to make fresh. But it was my childhood and the incidents and brand names anchor it for me. Your suggestion of tying the volta-ish ending with something that primes it earlier is making me think.

Thanks

Joe