Hi Jim,
Well, you've created a list poem, a pretty good one as far as list poems go. My personal taste is against so much repetition, all those "Is" and "thems." I started wondering of ways you could regroup lines by sounds and context into more of a cohesive narrative. Just for the sake of experiment, I began doing it, trying to keep your original phrasings but to sequence them more logically. Obviously you were intentionally not doing that, but I wonder what you could come up with if you did. Here's a quick sketch. I did change the ending—mine's not very good. I mean it only as an example of a direction you could take if you choose to.
I count my words then cage them,
contort them into sentences and
rearrange them. Tangle, mangle,
speak them to death and eat them.
I repeat them then delete them.
I want them, I collect them, I strip them
I see them, taste them, smell them, feel them.
I make them wear lipstick.
I fondle them. I pay for them. I pray for them.
I swear at them. I fight them. I abandon them.
I miss them. I listen as they leave.
I adore them but treat them like a whore.
I want more and more of them.
I’m addicted to them.
I find them simply irresistible.
I hear them singing. I reach
for their sweet song. I want their love,
but they are gone.
All the best,
Jim R.
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