Hi Julie,
Thanks for your thoughts. I tied them quickly to my finger with a string so that they could not slip away. You saw in this two things quickly that interested me too as I wrote this, one being whether unimaginable numbers of thoughts past and present could actually clutter an infinite void, and how I paired “there” and “where” in the poem as if they were place names. I actually did think of putting them in quotation marks at one point but quickly discarded the idea.
Hi Rick,
Thanks for the comments. Apparently my spare treatment is being received better than I anticipated. The bad news is that this may mean readers would prefer less of me rather than more of me. As to my use of “clutter,” as I more or less said to Julie, I like exploring the irony of an unquantifiable number of thoughts cluttering an unquantifiable stretch of space.
Hi Nick,
Your idea about no title is an interesting one. Of course I’ve seen that with Emily Dickinson’s poems, but I don’t recall others. I created the title “Existence” after first jotting down ‘Existentialism” as the title. I gave neither much thought. My first thought at present though is to mull over a title change rather than have no title at all, although that idea is an interesting one. Thanks.
Hi again, Alex,
It appears you have invigorated commentary rather than stifling it. I am still thinking about changes. I have to be careful in writing poetry for an audience. Positivity is always appreciated more than negativity. Your assurance that this piece is not too negative is appreciated.
Hi Susan,
The poem came quickly into existence and the title as well. I can see why the title could be considered pompous and too on-the-nose. On the other hand I could argue it needs a title that provides the reader guidance that the poem is striving to be more than it seems, that cues them that they are being asked to find philosophical depth (or pretension) as they choose to see it. Thanks for the suggestions. My first thought is that they are not quite what I want, but I’ll keep thinking about them.
Hi Glenn,
Thank you for your response and insights. As I think I’ve said, I am pleased and surprised by responses. As an additional aside, or thought as it were, years ago I submitted a set of short poems similar to this to a fairly well regarded lit mag. I received in return a personal note from the editor telling me that he liked them and that submission acceptance was a numbers game. I took that as an encouragement and almost as an apology for my work not being accepted. I think I had written all five poems in a space of thirty minutes. I only ever submitted them to one other mag, for which I received the standard kiss off. If I can find them, I’d like to take a look at them again. After all, I’ve only ever had two poems published.
|