That's not how I read S2. I read it that she wants to be able to "refuse to . . . outgrow the skintight sheath," etc., because the "price of living" is to outgrow that sheath but it's too painful. She doesn't want to shed that skin, but life forces her to do it.
I think the colon disrupts the grammar somewhat, so one could piece the meaning together in two different ways, but that was my take.
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