Hi Trevor,
If this is more than you want in the way of a critique please ignore it and forgive the intrusion. I wonder if this piece would have more impact if your word choices were a little more specific and connotative. As an example, here is the first stanza with some word substitutions that I think would lift the poem out of its subtle descriptive observer mode into a more subjective thematic approach:
Your epidermis is plotting,
shoving cells from deep within,
and even before they greet the light,
they're all discreetly murdered
All the best,
Jim
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