I was wondering about replacing "her easy" with "familiar"... Like Mark, I thought easy was maybe a tad too-too.
Love the poem, though. Understated but powerful, like others have said. And well-crafted and deeper than the straightforward diction might suggest.
When I struggled to find something helpful to say, I wondered about the final sentence fragment. It would be easy enough to link it into the preceding sentence or make it whole ("beneath is," "beneath's all"); however (grammar-fascist though I may be), I'm not at all sure that it's fragmentariness isn't part of its power.
Cheers,
--Simon
|