Hey David,
This is a charming poem. There's something wistful and endearing about it. I'll add some specific comments below.
Enjoy this.
Trev
I saw Eternity the other night. [Nice first line. I'd suggest removing the capital E]
It was like one of those photos
of Tube Stations in the last war[,]
[Remove stanza break?]
[h]uddled together, [all] mindful
of the [fearsome] booming overhead.
They are all gone into a world of flickering contingency, [nice line]
lighting up as we think of them, or dream,
which[, really,] is thinking without the handrails [of logic].
They can’t complain. [I'm not sure why you think this. Why can't they complain?]
There may [have] been communal singing.
Someone [may even have] had a ukulele.
[While I do like a last line, I feel like something else could follow it. Any more ideas?]
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