Hi Harry,
I suppose one way to do it would be to introduce a stanza with much shorter lines. It could things feel a little less frenetic for a bit. As it is, keeping up the frenetic pace/tone from start to finish feels a bit wearisome by the end. A break in that would give a different flow/structure overall, kinda like how a song consisting of only verses could be improved by adding a bridge, middle 8 or a chorus, if that makes sense.
Trev
Quote:
Originally Posted by Harry Nicolas
Thank you for the feedback Yves and Trevor.I don’t really understand what tone/pace means in the context of poetry, could you explain or maybe give an example?
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