Paradise
A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou--
Though maybe I'd prefer a pizza now.
A Question of Hygiene
They flee from me that sometime did me seek--
Maybe cuz I ain't showered in a week.
Country Life
Under the spreading chestnut tree
My dog is often wont to pee.
People Magazine Tailgater
The best laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft aglay--look at Ben and Jen.
Poe on the Curse of the Bambino
or, No Joy in Beantown
Once upon a midnight dreary
As I pondered weak and weary
Why the Sox can't win the Series...
(yes, I know, it's a triplet, sorry...)
Two Utilities Tailgaters
1
When icicles hang on the wall,
'Tis then the heat bills most appall...
2
My candle burns at both ends--
I didn't pay the light bill, friends.
Kubla Goes Suburban
In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately shopping center plan.
Miniver on the Net
Miniver Cheevy, child of scorn
Grew hot while he downloaded porn.
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